Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Vendor Call

IT Security folk have to fight off attackers and vandals and the careless and ignorant. We also have to fight vendors. Maybe fight isn't the right word. It all depends on your perspective.

Vendor Call

We vendors have what you need.
Just taste, you'll understand.
You think vendors just care about greed?
No, we're trying giving you a hand.
No one can solve the world's troubles,
Isolated and on your own.
You need friends though the crashes and bubbles,
For when the bad guys are looking to pwn.

My product can save you from evil!
My product can show ROI!
My product could defeat the devil
And stop an APT spy!

UTM, PCI, and IDS!
SOX, ISO, and IDS!
We cooked a full acronym stew.

We've got webinars, glossies, a PowerPoint slide.
We can send you evangelists and experts.
Let's talk! Let's chat! Please, let us inside!
Let us know everywhere it hurts.
We'll buy you some lunch, bring a T-shirt or two.
We've got pens and foam balls to spare.
Every promise we make is totally true.
You'll be relieved, without a care.

You cringe when we send you an email.
You ignore our voice messages.
But it's not just about making a sale
And removing your budget's vestiges.
Honest and true, our product is good.
Just give us a chance to show it.
We're solution providers! We're misunderstood!
It's your business, we wouldn't want to blow it!

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